Mar152011

When Gail Rules the World

Silloette - Romance

  • There will be decent food provided on airplanes, and by that I mean a protein that is not meat, plus a vegetable or a fruit, and a small whole grain item. If Starbucks can do a grapes and cheese with hardboiled egg why can’t United? There’s a thought, why not just hand over the food service contracts on short hauls to Starbucks? I’m not really a Starbucks fan, but it’s better than what they got now.
  • So-called “smart” traffic lights will recognize motorcycles.
  • If your child is not fit to be in public, it will not be allowed in public. Similarly, if you are not fit to be seen or smelled in public, you will not be allowed out of the house. Deodorant and showers are no longer optional. Neither, for that matter, is cheep perfume. Don’t even get me started on the subject of sweatpants.
  • Pre-distressed jeans will not exist. Distress them yourself. Poor jeans.
  • No one will ever put whiskey into eggnog. That’s brandy’s job!
  • You will not be permitted to use a picture of your infant as your facebook icon, nor give that infant its own facebook profile. In fact, no one will be allowed to post a picture of their spawn period, until such a time as that spawn boasts a full head of grown-in hair. I am sorry, but no matter what grandma says, not cute.
  • No website will play music on launch. No youtube video will start upon page visit.
  • Fiestaware dishes also will no longer exist. Just poof. (Don’t ask.)
  • There will be no cell phone contracts. When someone wishes to buy a phone they can buy whatever phone they want and then couple it with whatever provider they wish. I know, I know, crazy talk!

Give me time, I’m certain I will come up with more. What about you, Gentle Reader, any thoughts on ruling the world? Now remember, I demand frivolousness!

Gail’s Daily Dose
Your Infusion of Cute:
Gail’s New H&M Purchases


Your Tisane of Smart:
On The Use and Abuse of Condiments.
Your Writerly Tinctures:
On following up with an agent.

Timeless: Rough draft done! But very rough. So still a lot of work ahead of me. Time for the TKs.
Secret Project F: We’re waiting. We’re waiting.


BIG FAT SPOILER ALERT! Really, DON’T READ THE BLURB ON AMAZON if you haven’t read the other books first!

I had an appearance in Second Life recently, or that is I was interviewed for the Off the Shelf podcast. They very kindly sent me some pictures of the event:

Quote of the Day:
“If you would rule the world quietly, you must keep it amused.”
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Posted by Gail Carriger

 

No Responses

  1. Julie Lynn Hayes said:

    1) There will be a mandatory pasta day every week, and it will be white sauce only, no red need apply!
    2) Small animals shall never be carried inside of handbags upon pain of death!
    3) Artwork hanging in museums that resembles nothing recognizable will immediately be taken down and removed from sight!
    4) Itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikinis are now forbidden!

    Love the My Fair Lady photo!

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