Tagged cats

The Care & Feeding of Your Human Author – A Cat’s Perspective (Important for Writers)

Posted by Gail Carriger

Lilliput the Bean here.

I have hijacked my human’s blog.

For you, fellow cat-kind, I present my tips on how to care and feed your human authorbeast.

  1. Provide authorbeast with small kills as often as possible while singing the song of our people. Toy mice, fleece snakes, occasional burnt muffin bottom, or earplugs (I call them pinkies).
  2. Distract your authorbeast from overworking, often. They shouldn’t be allowed to focus too hard: walk across keyboard, nibble ankles, pretend to drink the tea.
  3. When in doubt, eat the laptop stand.
  4. Is your human sitting? Is there lap? Do they have a full bladder? Make those biscuits, make them!
  5. Attack your authorbeast through the filmy curtains. We all know they are see-through, but your human can’t tell. Humans aren’t that smart.
  6. Ostentatiously check objects in use, on the off chance that they might be tasty: iPad, phone, earbuds, kindle, corner of book, your human’s fingers and eyebrows.
  7. Test gravity regularly. Make absolutely certain it is always working properly. For science!

Now, go forth and help your authorbeast to write!

{Gail’s monthly read along for March is Crown Duel by Sherwood Smith.}



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Quote of the Day:

“Never trust a woman who wears mauve, whatever her age may be, or a woman over thirty-five who is fond of pink ribbons. It always means that they have a history.”

~ Oscar Wilde

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