Dear Lord Akeldama ~ Being a Vampire in the Digital Age

More from everyone’s favorite vampire advisor.

nm_samantha asks: What advice would you give to a newly created vampire?

Speak only when spoken to, introduce yourself properly before lunching, and consult your queen before leaving the house.

Diego Bruner asks: How has the digital age changed your information gathering “hobby.”

Ah, my little pixel, you never heard this from me, but it has had a greater effect on my dissemination of information. It is amazing what people will believe, especially with this new fangled wikipedia thingamabob. I can completely rewrite history to my own preferences. I mean, real my darlings, how else would you explain such a proliferation of fashion blogs?

Lady Star asks, Do you like how the manga artist has given you form?

Oh don’t I look so delightfully young? I am, as is the custom with most of us who have seen a few years pass by, rather more than delighted and flattered by any rendition that depicts me as lesser in years.

Lady Star asks: I wouldn’t be so bold as to ask the year, but when is the birthday of my favorite vampire?

My starling of the evening skies, I’m terrible sorry to say, I can no longer remember.

Beauasks: Dear Lord Akeldama, I was wondering what your feelings were on drone hopefuls who prefer to “tread the boards” as they say? I was recently cast as Le Beau in Shakespeare’s comedy As You Like It and much of my character work I have based off of your personality and fabulous image (I even get a folding fan which I get to snap open vigorously). I know it’s terribly “wolfish” of me, but I had hoped to gain your approval. Yours (If you want me), Beau

Ah, darling Beau! (What a perfectly splendid name, by the way, I am quite compelled to call you by it, as anything I might create should be inferior. I should dearly love to see such a production! I to tend to build my little collection from young men of consequence, it suits my various hobbies, but I have been know to branch out. Actors, as you might well know, can ply their skills in many ways off the stage as well as on, and as such I can only say, perhaps I have indeed poached form the werewolf domain upon occasion . . . perhaps next time your are in town, you could send round a playbill?

hanna asks: I have two questions. Firstly, I know that you’ve lived for several centuries, and I´m wondering what era is your favourite? Secondly, I’m guessing that you have met Ivy Hisselpenny several times. Which of her hats would you consider the ugliest?

I’m particularly partial to any era where in men are required to wear vert tight breeches, and lace, oh, and sparkles. I do love a man who sparkles. As for Miss Hisselpenny’s hats . . . words fail me. (And believe me, my sugared violet, I don’t say that lightly.)

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