It has been a very long time, Gentle Reader, but in honor of a new year…
Nissa asks: Who, if anyone, would you consider for a drone among the vastly talented and ridiculously handsome young British actors of today?
Benedict Cumberbatch. The name screams upper class, not to mention it’s like something my creator couldn’t come up with even in her wildest dreams, and of course, the diminutives are endless.
Mironiel asks: What is your favorite book and who is the author?
I’m rather partial to The Picture of Dorian Gray by Mr. Oscar Wilde.
Susan asks: I would also like to send you a bottle of Macallan 25 and one of Chateau Mouton and Lafite as wit, knowledge, and fashion sense should be rewarded. And I just know you’re HRH the Prince of Wales (Bertie) fashion advisor as he’s always so put together.
I do adore the bubbly, send it round dahling, send it round. I am at my leisure.
Ice asks: For fashion, what would you recommend for a girl who loves the ruffles of the 1880s, gothic fashions, and roses?
I’d say you should be following Dita Von Teese’s red carpet looks.
Hannah asks: Is there ever a time when it is appropriate for a lady to wear a top hat. And if so, what is the maximum height allowable.
For evenings only, of course. And the height of the hat should be commensurate with the proportions of the lady in question.
April asks: Given your love of Louis XIV fashion, I can imagine you also loved Art Nouveau, but I would love to hear you unvarnished opinion? Please?
My little gilt gosling, Baroque, for all it’s excess, is by-in-large symmetrical in execution. Art Nouveau can get a tad squiggly and off balance for my particular taste. I think it of for the young bloods to enjoy.
Michael asks: After reading through prior installments of your column, I am astonished to discover that no one has thought to inquire about Beau Brummel! Did you know him; were you friends, rivals or something more complicated?
Ah now, isn’t rivalry part and parcel with friendship? As if I could ever have any rivals! No dear boy, no, Mr. Brummel was a dear disciple of mine. You might say I trained him up in all things, and very proud of him I was too!
miss_in_trouble asks: Do vampires made by the same Queen are somehow related? If yes, does it mean that You are, perhaps related to the vampires from Wimbledon Hive?
My dear periwinkle, matters of blood, to vampires, are as such as near to matters of digestion as makes no difference, and thus not proper to discuss in polite company.
Sparrow I. Sprocket asks: I am having a wardrobe dilemma. You see, I am a girl (tawny hair, chocolate eyes, pale skin, and short stature) who usually wears neutral shades (black, gray, and white). I have been trying to make my wardrobe more colorful by trying on dark colors like navy blue and blood red. I’m even trying on natural tones like muted greens and browns. Nothing has worked. Please help!
Color is largely a matter of skin tone, my perturbed little bird. You describe yours as pale but is that pale with yellow, pink, or olive undertones? I should think your instincts towards muted are likely what’s off (since earth tones and the like are generally not well suited to a yellow or pink undertones which would be my guess from your hair color). You’re better off with jewel tones (emerald green or royal blue) or clear pastels (pink, lavender). Always start with scarves or statement necklaces. They put the color right next to your face and you will know immediately by people’s reactions if it works. Since people don’t realize the reality of the situation, complements are likely to be about the the colorful item (what a pretty scarf) which really means it suits your complexion, or about some other feature (wow, your eyes look really big today) which really means it suits your eye or hair color.
If you want to ask Lord Akeldama a question… please join the Chirrup.
Meanwhile: “Dumplets or Dumplings?” Lord A May have to have a drone named Dumplet now.
In other news I (or rather, Biffy) got quoted in my local paper.
Quote of the Day:
“If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they’ll kill you.”
~ Oscar WildeTags: Lord Akeldama, Victorian Fashion