Confessions of a Technophobe ~ Author Gail Carriger (Behind the Magic)

So let me set the scene, Gentle Reader.

Your Author Beast returned home after a month or so slaving away as an Archaeology Beast in the Andes.

She walks into the living room of her abode, distributes the requisite hugs and then . . .


Across the room the DVD machine quietly explodes with that death knell acrid smell of electronics and the small blue escaping genie of ultimate demise.

Here is the thing, no one in that room was surprised.

I have that kind of effect on electronics. I’m waiting patiently for one of those “who would fund that?” scientific studies to prove that yes indeed, there are people out there who just have an aura of anti technology. Something to do with magnetic alignment of brain waves, or whatever.

More recently I took out my phone, dead. This happens to me a lot so I went to plug it in. Lo, the SIM card was missing. Yes, missing, from behind the battery and the casing. No I hadn’t dropped the phone recently. Yes it was working perfectly not 24 hours earlier. How does that happen? No, no-one is playing a prank on me. The SIM card just managed to disappear, from inside my phone. This is my life with technology.

Gnomes. I blame gnomes.

As a result, I’ve found myself seeking some very low tech solutions to high tech problems. For example, being of a fashionable inclination I do not always wear a belt nor have pockets. This would appear to be a startling demographic to those involved in iPod case manufacturing. What I require is a spring-loaded clip, so I can actually attach my iPod to my clothing, belt or no. This used to exist but apparently is no more, at least not for my iPod.

My solution, rubber bands and a clothespin:

iPod Clip

In another example, my mobile, in classic cell phone fashion, does not get any reception inside my actual house. So I have rigged a little home for it under the eves of my porch. Ta da!

The Home of My Phone

Of course the flaw is, I very rarely hear my phone ring and I have to dash outside in order to answer it, but at least this way I do get my calls. Eventually.

I recently decided I had to try a standing desk arrangement. What did I do? I raised everything up using cardboard boxes.

My solutions, I must say, are not always taken seriously by others. Particularly the clothespin iPod. To which I always say, “Yes, but it works. And in the end, isn’t that what matters?” So I’m curious, anyone out there as oddball as me in the matter of low tech solutions? Or should I and my clothespin go skulk in embarrassed solitude on the porch with the hanging phone?

This blog was a quazi-reboot of the one I did for Babel Clash last year.

Gail’s Daily Dose
Your Infusion of Cute . . .

Your Tisane of Smart . . .
The Parasol Parade! Woodhouse, Sheffield hosts and annual Parasol Walk. Love it.
Your Writerly Tinctures . . .
Perception vrs. Reality in marketing.

Book News: Manga Updates!
Soulless manga gets spotted in ComicCon trends.
A tidy little blog on the Soulless manga from Geek News MTV.
Phoenix of Angels is blogging about the Soulless Manga
Fan Made Manga

Quote of the Day:
“The lady of the house takes the head of the table. The gentleman who led her down to dinner occupies the seat on her right hand, and the gentleman mext in order of precedence, that on her left. The master of the house takes the foot of the table. The lady whom he escorted sits on his right hand, and the lady next next in order of precedence on his left.”
~ Etiquette for Gentlemen, 1850
This came up in a recent conversation concerning chapter 3 of the manga.


Posted by Gail Carriger

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  1. Katelyn Hays said:

    Omg, so glad it is not just me. My brothers are both huge computer geeks and demi-gods of the technological world. And some how I have the ability to kill a computer or cell phone from twenty paces. Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone.

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